Dating: A Middle-Aged Widow’s Open Letter To The Man Who Thinks He Wants To Date Her
Dear You, On Dating Again Putting aside the state of my lady parts for a moment, the rub with the whole middle-aged dating thing…
Dear You, On Dating Again Putting aside the state of my lady parts for a moment, the rub with the whole middle-aged dating thing…
My inbox this morning is overrun with organisations advocating for black lives; pledging to be there for black mothers, black children, black businesses; for…
I gulped and pushed down tears as my children asked if we could eat out on Christmas Day. Through the din of their reasoning…
Hart graduating from university and then leaving almost immediately for New York may have contributed to my recent writer’s block. Afraid to write too…
“Depending on what they are, our habits will either make us or break us. We become what we repeatedly do.” ~Sean Covey The morning routine…
I am having a Bank Holiday weekend full of smiles, laughs and out and out can’t breathe hilarity. This coincides with the start again…
My son Hart and his bestie Ciara have a poignant and hilarious podcast called ‘Why Don’t You Love Me?’ “A weekly deep dive into…
Lately, me, colleagues and friends, all peers, begin a riotous, sad, pathetic, funny or otherwise tale. We will then typically stop our narration to…
Neither fire nor wind, birth nor death can erase our good deeds. ~ Buddha I’ve written a couple of times about Valentine’s Day. The…
There are two kinds of people: 1) those who believe everything happens for a reason; and 2) those who stare very hard at people…
When I was at school, I wanted to be an actress. This was in the years before we stopped grouping these creatives into male…
Hart was 12 when his school came down with a virus which felled the students like a raging forest fire. On average, it took…
As an early morning riser, I sometimes forget not everyone starts their day at 4.00 am. In this fit of forgetfulness, I have been…
It’s been a while since I’ve updated my blog or, indeed, been that much online, and it all started when I didn’t take my…
It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. ~ Berkeley Breathed I first heard the phrase “Once a man, twice a child” from my mother’s lips….
1 August 2018 – the funeral day for Kate. May she rest in peace. Our love and support are with her friends and family…
Have you ever thought about walking away from your blog? Yep, just up and going. See ya. Bloggers before you have done it. I’ve…
Be where you are, otherwise you will miss your life. ~ Buddha Growing up, my siblings and I were not allowed to refer to…
This week, I came to see that in nursing the hole of Bronson’s passing, there were smaller, gaping wounds which had been left to…
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
At a recent hospital appointment, the medical assistant asked my date of birth, which I gave. He looked up and down from his clipboard…
I read somewhere that a good habit is as hard to break as a bad one. My morning habit is to rise about 4.30…
My version of doing nothing is sitting down to read a book, perhaps whilst having a cup of peppermint or chai tea. I’ll then…
This personal essay first appeared in Black Hair Magazine on 27 March 2018 and is reproduced this week on my blog as it is no…
I’m trying to remember the last time I hand wrote a letter to someone. Not counting love letters, thank you notes and letters to…
A writing prompt on the internet this week (‘Leaving Home’) reminded me of a piece my then teenage daughter Morgan wrote in 2013. She…
To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you. ~ Lewis B. Smedes A business con man I…
I am 56 years’ old today and recently considered dying my black hair a fashionable grey. That midlife double bluff where people think we…
Since the radiotherapy days, my immune system is not as robust as it used to be and so I caught flu last week. Although,…
I went to see a boy band this week. That’s it then, Fargo, I thought, the last bastion of the middle-aged widow: watching a…
Underneath all the parenting angst, I yearned for the days when my teenager didn’t see me as the enemy, but their go-to person and…
As parents, we never know how happy we are until “the next thing,” and there is always the next thing. And have you noticed…
As reading material goes, I’m not big on biographies or memoirs. (The exception so far to my rule is ‘The Glass House’ by Jeanette Walls.)…
My twin sister and I once went to an Anthony Robbins convention. We’d made it to the final day where he was convincing us…
I hate pigeons. In my girlhood, someone told me these birds carry 52 communicable diseases. Since that was over 25 years ago, God only…
American sports fans, TV commentators, and the chattering classes in general, were outraged at a Texas Rangers vs. New York Yankees baseball game when…
Eight years’ ago, Bronnie died and it is something my youngest daughter Morgan said recently which informs my thoughts today. She and her brother recently met…
I took up food photography (This Girl Canon) as a hobby for the hell of it. Nothing as elaborate or artistic as some of the…
2017 is the first year I left behind feeling less worried and more accomplished than I have done since Bronson’s death in 2010. Given…
This week I’ve been practising letting go (again). You know, the coulda, woulda, shouldas we all have in our kit bag as to why…
Let’s talk about sex, baby. Let’s talk about you and me. Let’s talk about all the good things and the bad things that may…
Today’s featured picture is one of the blessed views I can now enjoy having made it through US Customs & Immigration for the Thanksgiving…
When I am a little down, one of my go-to remedies is my children – in varying degrees of dosage needed. Sensing that his…
On the trip to London yesterday, I had the pleasure of a live performance of ‘Naughty Child Runs Rampant on London Transport.’ There was…
A week of old photographs and sepia memories – and staring into that little girl’s eyes for a long time this week, I tried…
The writing prompt I set for Post-40 Bloggers this week is “The cavalry isn’t coming.” I always try to set the weekly writing prompts for…
Thursday on my personal Instagram, I posted a picture of a family portrait, which Bronnie, me and two of the children posed for in…
I’ve often wondered how people begging on the streets fare. I’ve wondered about the percentage of people who give, those who give grudgingly and…
A little girl fell over in front of me recently spilling a bag of sweets, which rolled one by one into oncoming traffic. Her…
I’m thinking surprises this week and surprising things. Like finding £20 in a jacket not worn for a while, or rocking up at the…
When I left my tiny village for the city a few years ago, I thought there wouldn’t be the same sense of community. And,…
There is a password for everything in modern living, and I am baffled as to how we are expected to keep up with the…
10% of every sale in my floral greeting card line (I Miss My Garden Greeting Cards) is put towards supporting children and adults living…
After 911, it was said Americans had lost their will to laugh. The comedy circuit stopped revolving and comedians were loud in their silence….
Bronnie and I would have been married 20 years today had he lived. As we got married on his birthday, he would also have…
As a freelance writer, it is a thrill when an independent magazine or publication picks up your work, and always orgasm-inducing when said publication…
Whatever I was to write about this week has of course been usurped by the terrible events in Manchester. My heart aches for those…
I am definitely at the age I call my ‘Bermuda Triangle Age.’ The age where middle-aged women can often feel invisible. Friday was my…
There seems to be something about a cyclist – or a 5ft woman kitted out in fluorescent yellow – which makes some motorists insane. Admittedly,…
Rather bafflingly this week, I accepted an invitation because the person offering would not take ‘No’ for an answer. Baffling because, up until this week,…
Most weeks, we go through our days like the Groundhog Day movie. We wake up and do exactly the same thing we did the…
I meet a lot of people charged with serving the public who are confused on that point. It is only fitting, therefore, when I…
My first memory of Robbie is as a little boy and me trying to take his hand. I’m not sure if he saw the…
I come from a family of talkers. Inevitably when we get together we talk about situations and the day-to-day trials involved in being human….
Mid-week, on the home straight from the morning workout (that is 15 minutes from home and not quite at the vomiting stage), a gentleman…
Apparently, a team of brain zappers in Toronto are able to isolate cells that carry fear-based memories. Tested on lab mice, the rodents could…
Being a goal oriented person, I am committed to regaining my previous levels of fitness, but what about those days when motivation packs its…
There is always a day each year – not always the same one – I officially name as spring. My favourite season, spring, is…
The first experience of death that really comes close when we are young is traumatic. Years on, watching your child experience the death of…
I was reminded this week to go back and examine how I feel about the recent spate of advertisements pushing female empowerment. This Wednesday,…
Long after one has forgotten what a woman wore, the memory of her perfume lingers. — Christian Dior I have a childhood memory of…
Proofing, also known as proving, is the final rise of shaped bread dough before baking. When I was younger and idealistic, I took exception…
After years of enduring the Saint Valentine’s Day holiday, I may finally be ready to wave the white flag and surrender. Finally listen to…
Our adult ticks are usually rooted in childhood, like our relaxed attitude to tardiness – or not! On one of the first dates with my…
In the beginning it was my husband who did most of the caregiving of the children — school runs, sports days, nativity plays —…
This week, an emboldened colleague was waxing non-lyrically about the rightness of jobs first for ‘British’ people – his narrative making it clear British…
Another source of inspiration for me this week came via a customer at work. A nice guy, but not someone I knew well at…
This weekend I visited the village that was my marital home for nearly 20 years. Although, I certainly had no interest in actually going…
During the hustle and bustle, and for the first Christmas since Bronnie died, I asked a question. What if I re-framed the experience? Wow! I’m writing this on…
I would say my apartment is a calm and noise-free zone. Even so, when I tried an exercise of mindfulness, I became aware of…
What hit my radar this week? Well, I was disappointed to learn that the word of the year, according to Dictionary.com, is ‘Xenophobia.’ The…
One of the beauties of growing older, for me at least, has been to stop minding what the chattering classes might say about, well,…
Near as damn it, each year in the summer, Team Fargo UK and Team Fargo US gather at the Little Compton, Rhode Island house….
Although it wasn’t supposed to have gone ‘like that,’ it did at yesterday’s surprising US election 2016 result. Many shenanigans have taken place during…
I love to gift, surprise people or give of my time where that is possible. What I’m not so shiny at is receiving gifts…
Today I brought a successful blog to an end. It is not something I saw coming but, as Mary Oliver says in ‘The Journey,’…
You add a bit of this, then a smidgen of that and, if it needs a little something extra, add some of this. Growing…
I discovered my productivity was better when writing in public and that the end product was not necessarily crap. I used to be a…
Now that he’s gone, I do find it hard to receive flowers from anyone else. Before we married, Bronnie used to send me flowers. It…
Before any big event, he would always say “You’ve got this.” That’s a memory I keep with me. Hmm, I’m going away and can…
By about Tuesday, I see visions of a weekend laid out before me like the whitest of 5-star hotel bed linen. Hello, my name…
It is dangerous to believe we’ve had our share of an ill-wind. That misfortune should stay awhile but then move on and go find someone else. That…